top of page

How To Find Your Personal Power

Updated: Apr 2

“Beauty is the illumination of your soul.”-John O’Donohue

There are many ways we women can change our outward appearance in order to feel beautiful.

No matter what we decide to do to enhance our physical appearance, the vibration that other people pick up on will always reflect our internal dialogue. I’m a firm believer in living inside out, so I encourage my clients to start shifting how they feel about themselves before they expect to see that new energy reflected to them via a mirror or the eyes of those they love.

In our physical body we have seven main chakras or energy centers that bring energy into the body and serve as gateways for energy to leave our body. We can engage with people from any of these centers making our exchange with them connected to the issues governed by those centers. For example, connecting with a love interest from your sacral chakra (2nd chakra) is all about your physical connection with them i.e., sexual chemistry, as opposed to your heart center (4th chakra) which is more about your emotional connection with them. The solar plexus (3rd chakra) is in the stomach area of our body and deals with control or power in a relationship. It also happens to be the home of our self-esteem, our center of personal power.

Identifying a person with high self-esteem is a no brainer if you can read body language. Go to any gym and watch men strut around and you’ll get a clear sense of what I’m talking about. They pull their shoulders back exposing their muscular chests and swinging those well laden biceps and triceps as though they own the joint. If we could read their minds, we would be hearing that they have no problem claiming their space, (root chakra), feeling able to satisfy their woman (sacral chakra) and pursuing the women they desire (solar plexus chakra). We can feel that vibe permeate the air like cheap cologne. The energy they hold is the energy they demonstrate. You don’t have to be buff in order to increase your self-esteem. You DO have to be willing to be honest with yourself and choose the more powerful thought in any given situation. The goal here is to keep the energy in the solar plexus and move it upward into the higher energy centers in the body. When we surrender our power to those around us, we deplete this chakra. By choosing to find ways to approach our issues from a new more empowered lens, we move the energy upward into the heart chakra where we can view the situation from a more connected place. By engaging with life from this vantage point we can then flow the energy even further upward in the body into the 3rd eye (6th chakra) aligning our will with our vision of life rather than letting it leak out when we think or behave in disempowered ways.

Here’s my formula to find my power in any given situation:

Voice it. I name the experience that’s causing the conflict within as this helps me to identify my truth. We feel the vibration of the spoken word in our body, so this is a great place to start. Truth always lands as it offers a physical reaction in our body when the words match the intention. As I talk out loud and tune into my body (looking like a crazy person perhaps) I can discover the source of pain or unhappiness.

It’s all about me! I keep it in first person and in the present tense as this is where my power is. Anytime I use an “I” statement I call my power back to me because I am owning my experience. This is the key to changing anything. I can’t change what I don’t acknowledge, so this step is crucial. I also can’t change the past, and I don’t know the future (I can sense what’s coming, but it’s subject to change as free will enters in) …the here and now is where it’s at! By focusing my attention on what’s in front of me, not what happened or what could happen, I stay present with myself demonstrating that I will not abandon me in my big or small moments.

Still me. What’s my role in this? Do I have ownership of what happened? Is there something I said or didn’t say? Is there something I did or didn’t do? OWN IT! If I want recovery with another person or situation, I must be willing to move towards the center. Holding my stance (staying in 3rd chakra) leaves no room for change. The situation becomes a battle of wills. I can’t own that my words made you react a certain way, but I can become more cognizant of my word choice. If I want to be in relationship with you, how you feel will matter. By choosing to engage with another person from the higher center of the heart chakra, I choose to allow my emotions to weigh in on the exchange.

I’m good. If I know I did everything I could and the situation still could not be resolved, I LET IT GO. My guides used to show me a soldier putting his foot forward and I would see the words “best foot forward”, in my mind’s eye. This was my cue that I had done everything I could with a client, and the rest was up to them. Part of growth is learning to accept that everybody has their own journey. I am not privy to their life journey. I can only weigh in on the ways that their choices affect me and set my boundaries (solar plexus chakra) accordingly.

When I realize I am done with a pattern, those people that are still learning how to navigate life through that patterning, are no longer a vibrational match to me. I am not better than they are. I am now different. I am not smarter than they are. I am now different. I am not more spiritual than they are. I am now different. I simply am no longer participating in our old dynamic, so I am not a match for them vibrationally. Staying in the old energy no longer serves me, so I will begin to meet new people (or become reacquainted with old friends) that pique my interest and take me in a new direction. When I feel neutral and can no longer be activated or animated by the person or situation, I know I am ready to move on and that those relationships will end.

Reframe. Changing my perspective is always my choice. I may not be able to heal my body of the dis-ease I’m experiencing, but I can look at the ways it is serving me. Maybe it is allowing me to accept leaning on friends and family for support because I’m usually the one that takes care of others. I may not be able to control losing my job, but I can examine if it challenged me and engaged my creativity and choose to see this loss as an opportunity to find work that does. Or perhaps I am developing another part of my life, so finding a less demanding job will allow me to devote my evenings to writing, working out, or learning a new skill. I cannot control the weather and the destruction that occurs as a result of her violent temper, but I can unite with my community and offer my resources or talents to those that lost theirs reminding all of us that we’re all connected.

There will always be win inside of a loss, if we are willing to discover it. This is what power looks like inside the body. CHOICE. When we hold our power, we don’t need to prove our worth to others because we know our value. Life is not fair. It isn’t meant to be. It is meant to provide your spirit will ample opportunity to rise up and be the powerful being you were born to be. Finding your personal power ladies, is a great place to start your beauty makeover because true beauty is letting your inner light shine through.

7 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All


bottom of page