In 2003 I had my gall bladder removed. It was one year following the birth of my youngest son. I was 33 years old. As an energy worker I am well aware that issues with a gallbladder are related to anger turned inward. The gallbladder is located in the solar plexus energy center, and it is where we move our energy out into the world. It’s mantra is I decidehow to direct my energy and in those days I did not feel like I could.
Refusing the call
I can see looking back that I distracted myself from my internal world by making my external world the picture of perfection. I was well ensconced in the habit of numbing any feelings that would well up inside me because I did not feel confident enough to change my life in any significant way. Year after year of accumulated fear solidified in my etheric body (the energy body outlining the physical body), making the flow of healthy energy through my power center impossible.
When I divorced I once again dealt with pain in this part of my body. My stomach, the area of the body where we digest food and energetically assimilate ideas, was so inflamed that I was put on a prescription medicine. My body was communicating that my thoughts were negatively impacting me. This time I listened. I adjusted my diet and started the process of creating more peace in my life by letting go of the people and situations that contradicted how I wanted to feel about myself.
Crossing the Threshold
An illness will impact the etheric body before it makes its way into the physical body. By penetrating the emotional and mental body first, it gives us the opportunity to determine if we want to accept and adopt its vibration or reject and return it to the universe. Consistent thoughts of any kind are crystallized and reflected in our outside world, making this a crucial moment of choice. When we choose disempowered thoughts we align with any experience in that frequency range including dis-ease. From an energetic perspective, years of thinking in limited ways create experiences of living in limited ways including ill health.
We have all heard about the mind, body, spirit connection. The spirit is the divine part of our being that is connected to universal wisdom. It is the overarching voice resounding in our minds, and the unconditional love beating in our hearts. With its guidance we can use each negative situation as a lens to see ourselves from the larger perspective of the collective whole.
Tests and Allies
The ways in which I chose to suppress my emotions and distract my thoughts relieved my emotional and mental anguish. Having my gallbladder removed and taking prescription pills alleviated my physical pain. None of it healed the source of that pain which was a deep and profound unhappiness in my relationships. Was I strong enough to withstand the discomfort and brave enough to take the steps needed to change my life for the better when my gallbladder failed? Unfortunately, not. My commitment to my children’s happiness and the values I held around family won out. It would take 21 years to give myself permission to embrace my true feelings and make loving myself my priority.
My intuition guided me to investigate my gut microbiome. I started making smoothies every morning with different fruits, veggies and live probiotics to see what effect it would have on my health. I have been shocked with the results! My body is starting to function at its peak. My energy has increased making workouts more palatable. Exercise grounds me, creating the energetic space for hidden feelings and deep thoughts to rise to the surface of my awareness. As I let go of my judgements about them and use them to inform me of the path that I am on, I decide if I want to live the result of that journey. Old habits of coping are moving to the forefront and getting their marching orders. Somedays I am overwhelmed. This too shall pass has become my new mantra.
The Road Back
On the upside, my psychic sensitivities are growing to include clairsentience. My clairvoyance (clear seeing) located between the brows, and clairaudience (clear hearing) located between the throat and ears have in the past always been my go tos in communicating with the spirit world. Now suddenly I am able to use my clairsentience (clear feeling) located in the stomach area of my body. My guides explained that until I healed this part of my body, and was willing to embrace my own feelings, that I would not be able to distinguish my energy from that of others. Healing this energy center was paramount to growing my spidey senses! Perceiving someone’s true intention is incredibly valuable when helping them to align their energy.
The Freedom to Live
We can all travel from victim to victor in our lives. We can stay fit by shadow boxing and practice self-care through nurturing our spirit daily. We can choose to connect any rigid thought with an inflexible body. We can soften our approach of self-criticism and rely instead on self-acceptance. We can allow our adversities to be our guide or harbinger of growth, trusting that each moment is in perfect harmony with our hero’s journey.
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